Hey there —

What do you want more than anything right now?

Maybe you’d love to trade in your car for one with <100,000 miles. Quit your 9-5 to pursue a creative passion. Or finally own your own home.

Goals like these drive us to improve our lives. But we’ve got bad news. Getting the stuff you’ve always wanted won’t make you happy. Or at least, not for as long as you hope.

That euphoria you feel when you reach a goal or accomplish something great — it has a shelf life. Whether it’s getting a promotion, buying your first house, or reaching 10K subscribers, eventually that achievement will start to feel…normal.

It’s all thanks to something called “hedonic adaptation” (or the “hedonic treadmill”).

Basically, we’re hardwired to return to our natural baseline level of happiness no matter what. Hedonic adaptation is why:

🤑 Most people who win the lottery return to their original levels of happiness within a year.
💍 “Just married!” eventually turns into “Just…married” after a couple years.
📵 Dropping your phone into the toilet sucks – only until you get it replaced.

Hedonic adaptation makes it easier for us to bounce back from loss or disappointment. But, over time, it also dulls the shine of our success — no matter how big or “life-changing” it is.

As Daniel Gilbert says in his book Stumbling on Happiness:

“Among life’s cruelest truths is this one: wonderful things are especially wonderful the first time they happen, but their wonderfulness wanes with repetition.”

If this all sounds super depressing, it doesn’t have to be. While we may not be able to escape hedonic adaptation completely, we can curb its negative effects.

Instead of chasing the next happiness high, pursue your goals with a more present and grateful mindset. Here’s how:

1. Buy less stuff.Research has repeatedly shown that experiences are more valuable than possessions. Instead of buying that fancy espresso machine, purchase a membership to your local art museum, or take a roadtrip to visit a friend.

2. Slow down and savor things. Enjoy your pad thai at lunch. Actually taste the spices. Don’t mindlessly inhale it while you check email.

3. Shift your perspective. Imagine what life would be like if you lost the things you take for granted. Your “dumb” job. Your “boring” hobby. Your “old” Macbook. Realizing just how good you have it can be a great antidote to hedonic adaptation’s pull.

4. Make gratitude a habit. Regularly counting your blessings can help you focus on the happiness right in front of you, instead of what may (or may not) be over the next horizon. Keep a gratitude journal, use a notes app, or write an actual thank you card. (Then mail it to an actual person!)

It’s ok to have big, ambitious goals (we do!). But where you are right now is pretty awesome too. Step off the treadmill and enjoy it.

3:45 PM

Video | by Alisha Liu

It’s 3:45 on a Sunday afternoon. Two friends are having a picnic in the park. One of them sinks into the deep end of existentialism.

“We’re just teeny tiny specks in the universe. Will anything we do ever feel like it’s enough?”

Listen to what her friend has to say.

Watch the video → 

Remember: What You Do Is Not Who You Are

Article | by Tim Herrera

For many of us, “our identity has become inseparably tied to the thing we do to make money.”

But bad things happen when your sense of self is defined by how well you did at work, or whether you like your job.

Tim Herrera has a simple tip to compartmentalize your life: Think of your job as a verb, not a noun. Instead of saying, “I’m a content creator,” say, “I create content.”

(Unless you’re a surgeon. Don’t say “I cut people open” at a party.)

Read the article →

Eunoia

Website | by Steph Smith

At a loss for words? Maybe you just need to try another language.

Meet: Eunoia.

This site contains 500+ untranslatable words to give a name to all those emotions you can’t express.

Here are some of our favorites:

• L'esprit de l'escalier (French): Thinking of the perfect reply after the conversation is over

• Irusu (Japanese): Pretending to be out when someone’s at your door

• Backpfeifengesicht (German): A face in need of a slap

Try it out →

Written by Rochi Zalani

Edited by Matt D'Avella & Ashley Martin