Life’s a mess. And that’s ok.

Would you say life is linear? Probably not.

September 20, 2021

Hey there —

Life is great at throwing you curveballs. You don’t get into the dream school. You get fired from your job out of the blue. You find out you’re allergic to dairy (tragic).

Most of us understand life is anything but linear, but when we experience setbacks we tend to beat ourselves up about it. Feelings of guilt, shame, regret, and confusion come on strong. So what gives?

Why can’t we be kinder to ourselves when things don’t go according to plan?

The first reason is cognitive dissonance. As kids, we’re told that life is simple. You just have to finish school, land a great job, get married to your soulmate, and have 2.5 kids and a dog. Maybe build a seven-figure business or write a novel while you’re at it.

Easy peasy.

Then life begins to unravel (because of course it does). We have a change of heart, suffer a sudden loss, or, you know, experience a worldwide pandemic. Your career, love life, or personal goals don't go according to plan, and things break down because you never gave yourself any other option but an unrealistic bee line to success.

The second reason is hustle culture.

Thanks to #sleepisforlosers we’re not encouraged to share all the (necessary) dips, breaks, or setbacks on our meandering path to progress. Success is only meant to go in one direction: Up. And when it doesn’t, we panic.

But if everyone’s journey was a steady accumulation of successes, we wouldn’t learn anything along the way, or be grateful for what we have. It’s during the difficult times that we demonstrate grit and perseverance. But more importantly, it's when we learn what we really want in life.

As American businesswoman, Marne Levine put it:

I definitely have not had a linear path. I have had more of a path where I've meandered with a sense of purpose. Really, what that means is it's about being true to your convictions and your passions but also leaving yourself open to opportunities when they come along.

The next time you get thrown off course, remember it’s not life catapulting you back to square one. It’s an opportunity to try something new.

Embrace the zig-zag, take the anti-nausea pill if you have to, and enjoy the (bumpy) ride. You might like where you end up.

Your Ears Are Plugged

Web Comic | by The Oatmeal

The number one phrase that kills both productivity and creativity?

“We’ve always done it this way.”

Cartoonist Mathew Inman used to live and die by this mantra. For years, he drew his comics with a clunky software called Fireworks until finally, Inman cracked and decided to learn Illustrator.

While he was getting the grasp of the new software, he figured he’d revamp his illustration style as well and create a graphic novel instead of his usual meme-style images.

What used to take a few hours now took hundreds. But two things happened when Inman finally finished his first Illustrator project:

  1. He won an Eisner Award

  2. He learned that it was okay to experiment with new creative ventures

It’s not easy to blow up your assembly line and peel away from what “you’ve always done.” Giving up hard-earned muscle memory is a pain.

But Inman’s story reminds us that it’s important to try new things. Because when you do, your ears will “pop” and you’ll gain new found clarity on both a productive and creative level.

Your Flaws are More Attractive Than You Think They Are

Article | by Emily Esfahani Smith

Pobody's nerfect.

Yet we all put a lot of effort into convincing others we have it together.

We put concealer on our acne, dye our gray strands, and swipe filters onto our selfies. Or when you climb a flight of stairs and mask how heavy you're breathing so people don’t think you’re out of shape (we’ve all been there).

It’s normal to hide your flaws, but research shows that disclosing the not-so-perfect parts of yourself has its upsides.

This article by The Atlantic dissects the “Beautiful Mess Effect,” which is a phenomenon where we view people’s vulnerability more positively than our own.

It turns out that some cool things happen when you open up about your flaws:

✔️ People admire your bravery

✔️ You seem more approachable

✔️ It fosters intimacy

✔️ You appear more competent to coworkers and advisers

We all want to relate to each other during this weird human experience. And it turns out, our imperfections are what connect us. Don’t be afraid to put them out there.

Nestflix

Website | by Lynn Fisher

We interrupt our usual article synopsis by introducing something you’ve probably never heard of before: Nestflix.

No, not Netflix.

Nest-flix.

Nestflix is a wiki disguised as a streaming platform that showcases fictional movies-within-movies and fake shows within shows. It’s pretty niche stuff.

Forrest Gump sequel? They’ve got you. Michael Scott’s movie Threat Level Midnight? You bet. In the mood for Shakespeare and Arnold Schwarzenegger? An interesting combo, but yep, it’s listed there too.

Take a gander. We guarantee you’ll stumble on something unexpected.

TL;DR

If you’re into niche remakes and spinoffs, check out Nestflix, a wiki disguised as a streaming platform.

Zulie Rane

This week we’re featuring Zulie, a freelance content creator. Zulie’s a top-performing Medium writer, a new-ish YouTuber, and a committed cat mom. After writing online for three years, she’s made over $60,000 and now helps other creators learn how to do the same through Medium and freelance writing.

Introduce yourself! Who are you?

I'm Zulie Rane, a full time blogger/cat mom. I make a living by writing about what I love.

Why do you create? Who is your content for?

I have always wanted to be a writer, but only ever imagined myself as a novelist. When I started writing blog posts, I realized I could write about anything and build my business that way. I create content for people who want to pursue the same journey - investigating sources of income, creating guides and tutorials, and talking about the pitfalls I fell into/tripped into along the way.

The biggest lesson you’ve learned since you began creating content?

You need multiple sources of revenue. You will get burned out of dealing with clients; platforms change algorithms at a moment's notice. Multiple streams mean you'll always stay afloat AND do work you love and find meaningful.

One thing you wish you knew before you started?

Time is sometimes worth more than money. Hiring a VA and a graphic designer costs money but saves me time and energy, which is precious to me.

In one to two sentences, what’s one piece of advice you’d give to aspiring creators or self-development nerds?

Never settle - you can always do better. If you think you've reached the top, you haven't looked high enough.

Would you rather Copy/Paste in real life, or Undo?

Copy/paste! Much more potential. I'd copy my good hair days, my productive energy days, Jeff Bezos' bank account, my fridge after I grocery shopped.

Written by Alice Lemée